Busy Busy Busy

It's too hot to be this busy *flicks sweat at the monitor .. this morning Nina and I went to Opportunity Group for the very last time =(( ...it was awful.. well, the group wasn't but the feeling deep in the pit of my stomach was ..i was enjoying it so much and that felt wrong- i actually felt guilty =/ ..it was a teddy bears picnic and i let Nina choose the teddy she wanted to take (with Lauren i would have coaxed her to the teddy that i wanted her to take and i am trying to learn from my mistakes) ..i don't think it helped that she pulled out the very first teddy she ever got, only a little doggy but it was bigger than she was when she was born and i was feeling sentimental as it was.. we were late arriving due to an accident on the roads and i felt like all eyes were on us -i still haven't shaken that feeling and we've been attending now for almost five months =( ..as a treat we were going to go outside and play- glorious (Tilly-melting) sunshine and a field full of toys and activities... Nina particularly loves the little parachute when Aileen comes so when she saw the enormous version they pulled out she was totally in her element

Once back inside the kids all sat down to have a drink and some treats together and Nina took no time in finding herself a seat and starting jabbering away to the poor lad next to her *L .. who'd have thought huh =)) .. everything ran pretty much as a normal group would from there... a little playtime before tidying up and singing a few songs.. Nina was in fine tune again and thats when it hit me that we wouldn't be going again and just how far we'd come in such a short time ...all the other kids had gotten bored towards the end but Nina was still going strong singing 'Time to go Home' in the middle of the mats so i went to collect our bags ...Jill and Lyndsey were both in tears when we said our goodbyes =(( .. *sighs* i tried, but am crap *L .. such an emotional fish i swear *L .. even Kevin the taximan said they shouldn't have told me this was the last one until i'd gotten home and he even applauded me on bringing up such a lovely polite child and he pointed out that he had seen such great improvement from Nina and that she was going to get on great in this world ..bless him =) i hope we cross paths again ...the big deal tho- and its hitting me hard as i type- is that Nina just doesn't get it- she doesn't understand that we won't be going back, just as much as she doesn't understand that Aileen won't visit after next week- thats what hurts.. she's constantly going on about them both now, they are part of her little world and it hurts that whilst i know she'll forget and move on, she'll have no recollection of these people as other people and events come into her life- roll on September i suppose, when Nina believes she is going to be going to school with Lauren *LMAO -i'll explain that to her better nearer the time i think =))

However, moving onto 'Mummys Little Precious' ...this evening we were invited to attend a Presentation Evening at Laurens school- i thought it was a standard thing and would be extremely boring so i didn't action the letter that i received thro the post at the weekend until Lauren informs me late last night that actually, this is a personal invite and only those specifically chosen to attend have received such invitation .... oooooooooh *vbg ...not only that, but for the second time in a week, Lauren has been asked to provide the incidental music on the piano for a school event -i am one VERY proud mummy today =)) .. so, in all seriousness, i am not looking forward to spending an hour (yeah right, an hour...pftt!) in the school hall where we will be squeezed in on one of the hottest days in the UK ever whilst the teacher drones on and on about how wonderful the school is and how amazing everyone is .. and basically, its going to be a Love-Fest for sure *L .. (i'm pleasantly surprised when the whole thing is done and dusted in just under forty minutes *gasps*) ...we arrive just in time to catch Laurens best friend (and her mum) walking thro the door so at least i have someone (said friends mum) to sit with .. and then we find a seat whilst Lauren sets up the baby grand in the corner of the hall- i have a perfect spot to watch her whilst she has no clue where i am sat .. sneaky ;) ..its odd to see her on such a big piano whilst we only have a keyboard at home but she isn't phased at all.. and by 'at all' i mean she is sat playing the piano whilst leaning to one side chatting with her friends *LOL ...i'm far more nervous than she is but i had that welling up feeling inside, even more so when i heard the people behind me saying how awesome she was -i was going to do yet another '*vbg' then but i've done a few too many already, but.. grinning like a Cheshire Cat i was =)) when everyone was seated, before the ceremony officially began, Lauren got a mention, and thanked for playing along with raptuous applause -she took it all in her stride- i cried ...again ;) ..the award Lauren received was a "Subject Award" and she gained hers for her School Years music lessons- for insight, enthusiasm, progress and other such stuff the Head Teacher spouted about her

Laurens decided to keep her certificate (and program) in an album along with other notifications she has received in the last nine months and the gift voucher she received as a further incentive, she plans to spend on more music books =))

Today is officially 'Big Up My Kids Because I Am The Proudest Ever Mummy' Day ;)